Dry Run

Pa PA paa paa… pa pa pa pa paaa. Dhun dhun….

Pa PA paa paa… pa pa pa pa paaa. Dhun dhun…

Taan taan taaa taa tat a tat a taaannnnn…..

                                       ----UNIVERSAL----

 

I swear to god if (God Forbid) the "Multiplex – Producer" standoff does not end soon this is how my dreams wud start off. C’mon guys ur holding the whole country’s entertainment @ gunpoint. This is sheer violence. I miss the Big screen magic. I miss the release by dozen attitude of our very own bollywood. I miss Rajeev Masand’s rhyming bull crap reviews. Now, let me get this straight, it’s not like I’m gonna watch every other 2 bit movie that is put up in the theatre. But I miss all the action that surrounds it, it’s like Diwali in Gujarat or like Weddings in Punjab orDelhi where it’s not just the main event that’s of interest but the sub-events before and after the main event. To name a few I’d love to see the skeleton faced “My Daddy is a producer” Jacky’s ass-whipped in public reviews, I’d like to see mindless skimpily clad “zero size“ models running around in the background of a desi movie song for no reason what so ever, I’d also like to play “Who’s ur media partner” game, by comparing the no. of star’s they give in movie review. And last but not the least “Running Successfully in a Theatre near you”, “Blockbuster” & “Super Hit” tags attached in promos the following week. Ah!! Good ol’ days they were.

 

And wha’s the hell is wrong with Hollywood guys, I don understand ur “no issue, no gain , no release” funda. It seems like they are so engrossed watching the "Producer – Multiplex" standoff that they forgot to send in the reels for INDIA RELEASE. For all you know they might have received a rude shock when they heard things like

1.       “SRK- AAMIR put their differences aside to express their solidarity with producers”,

2.       “I’m ready to clean toilets of theatre’s - AAMIR”,

3.       “This is my lucky year, and Jacky (in Kal Kisne Dekha) will be a hit- Vashu Bhagnani”

Now the first 2 dialogues I guess wud have caught their hollywood counterparts in a emotional fix and I guess wud have played a crucial part in their decision to hold back the release of Hollywood movies. But the moment the 3^rd statement was put in the papers I guess they realized it’s all bullshit and that this drama is leading nowhere. Thanks to Bhagnani sir thar “Angels & Demons” is finally releasing this Friday. Not that I carry a huge expectationa off it, but it’s good to end the dry run by watching Tom Hanks denouncing or rather questioning the very foundation of ppl’s religious beliefs on big screen.

 

P.S:-  No I Don’t wanna end this post by saying “Jai Ho!”

P.P.S:- Just so that I don’t do it Literally J

The Urban Warrior

It was the day many dreaded, the day when the strongest kinds ran around with their tails tucked between their legs. But unlike them I was determined, I was prepared. I stepped in to the arena feeling Déjà vu. I saw others who were der before me, lying down, my fellow men, wincing with pain, they had done their duty fearless and leading from the front. But the enemy was cunning, he was skillful and prepared. Although we outnumbered him by far, he somehow clearly had an upper hand on the situation.

I slowly geared up, allowing nothing to deter me from the ultimate face off. It was then I saw the enemy, who stood across the heap where my fellow men lie in a pool of blood. He was unscathed, determined as a morning sun. Wearing his appearance, which was his biggest weapon, lean and fragile, which gave the opposition a thrust in their confidence only to make some horrendous mistake and then finally fall to him. But I told myself that it will not be the case with me, I will bring him down and emerge victorious.

I stood across the arena waiting for the right moment to commence our battle, then at that moment he looked up from his latest kill right into my eyes and invited me with the slightest of nod, I responded with a nod, den v both charged towards each other, both jus keeping our eye contact, not shouting, not showing the slightest of fear or strength, trying to conserve all energy for the battle ahead.

There was still lot of ground our thumping feet needed to cover before we actually could have had a strike. It was den he did the unexpected: he slightly deviated from his path took some giant steps and leapt into the air, holding his weapon which looked like a spear, but smaller, high above his head ready to strike. In a quick reflex I moved away, seeing which he twisted mid-air and kicked me on my chest. I was thrown to the ground. It was a bad fall. I turned around to guard myself against him, but only to realize I was too late to do that. He was already charging down at me like a wild bull, he struck me again with the butt of his weapon, which I still couldn’t quite figure out as to what it really was.

I felt my hand loosen its grip over the weapon I held, he again delivered a severe blow, and quickly jumped on me to capitalize on me when I’m down. He looked down at me with what looked like pity in his eyes; he raised his weapon, which was now shining like a piece of silver, ready to strike. Before he did strike he uttered the words that the legend told he always did: “Don’t Worry it won’t Hurt”. Den I experienced a piercing pain in my arm, I opened my eyes to see him smiling, I smiled back, suddenly a realization made him to stare back at me wiping out the smile from his face. I looked up and told “Dude u missed the spot”. He looked back at wound only to realize that my words were true. He pulled out his weapon from my arm and stuck again, this time right on target. I lay there feeling weak, for it all to get over with. After 10mins he tapped my shoulder, pulled out his weapon, checked the bag in which he collected my blood and looked up and told: “Thank you for donating blood sir, please have the sandwich and juice over the counter. It’s complimentary” :)

To the unknown ....

Oh sweetest of all sweethearts,
Ur the one who'll rule my thoughts,
When u choose to preside as the queen of my heart,
My life's picture will figure it's last connecting dot.

With Love,
Vatras

A Step in Right direction

I will not say that this may be a breakthrough of some kind. But it certainly is a step in right direction. For once keep ur sarcasm and finger pointing antiques at home and support a initiative. I hope things change for good.

http://www.552indians.com/

Mumbai

When the feelings of sympathy, apathy, disgust, horror run thru every Indian and foreigner alike in this hour of terror. When OUR Mumbai is under attack!! it's included in our prayers, our wishes and our tears. Hoping this ordeal ends soon. Hoping we catch hold of these terrorist, bring them to their knees, bring peace to the families of the brave ones who are there fighting them off. Bring Justice to the ones who became martyrs for this act of terror.

 

36 Hours* as of now, I am still listening to the reporters, who are doing what they are supposed to do, seeing Policemen,  NSG, Army personnel doing whatever they can to end this, Common man – The Great Indian Common man – as always going out of his way to help – Consoling grieving relatives outside the Police cordoned area, Serving tea, serving eatables, some of them went in to help the needy, the injured, the hotel staff (20 till now) laid their lives protecting the GUESTS, NO these ppl were in no way related to any one there, still they were /ARE doing this.

 

When I hear all this I can't help wondering, "BTW boss!! Where the hell are the so called "Protectors of Marathi Manoos" when they are needed the most???" when their ppl are being slaughtered in CST, in Nariman, in Taj and Oberoi. Where are they??? Where are their swords, which they told they had drawn out only, and only to protect their ppl from being subject to INJUSTICE. Well Mr. is is ur time, come out in hoards, u need not fight, just come out in numbers, to show strength, to help the one in need, to assist the weak, to send jitters down the terrorists' spine (if they have one i.e.,). But alas! It requires character and guts to do the above. All I ask is, if a common man can do this stuff why not u?? Anyways forget, U can't boss, ur better off beatin an INDIAN than a TERRORIST. Cos the latter has the potential to Retaliate, Strike and Execute, the extent to which the patient and helpless former wouldn't go to.

 

One request, Next time u decide the beat the pulp out of a helpless NORTH INDIAN ( a hoard of men beatin the shit out of couple of men, is no Brave thing Mr.) just think of the place u were holed up in when these terrorists invaded YOUR city, and were HURTING YOUR people.

 

Huh, fuggin hypocrite!!